RIOTTEDCATASTROPHE!

1. I’m screwing up my own life.
2. I know your gonna hate me for being so fucking gl.
3. I don’t know why I’m doing this cause I know it’ll hurt you. &I don’t want to. But maybe this once I want you to know.
4. Lying, being this heartless and acting like I don’t give a damn is so hard. Funny how doing it to me comes so naturally to you.
5. To you I must be picking a fight over nothing. Maybe it’s just all this built up shit.
6. I don’t know by doing this what I wish to get out of it anymore.
8. Maybe its just karma baby.
9. Sorry. :(
10. Want something that’s not right.
11. Knows there will be many times later on I regret not giving in
12. Introverting myself. &Yet still needs someone.
13. Believes no one will be there for cause I’ve chased everyone away.
14. Trying to numb myself.
15. Trying to drown myself in studies and yet I can’t concentrate. &For now might just be wishing EOYs will never end so I won’t free have time to think.
16. Heart never felt so heavy.
17. Need to get my happy back asap.
18. Something’s wrong with me. I hate myself.
19. Dreading school.
20. Thinks some people reading this are happy to know my life is far from perfect.
21. Someone please care tyvm.

removed some.

Don't try to explain your mind
I know what's happening here
One minute it's love and suddenly
It's like a battle-field
One word turns into a war
Why is it the smallest things that tear us down
My world's nothing when you don't
I'm not here without a shield
Can't go back now

Both hands tied behind my back with nothing
Oh no
These times when we climb so fast to fall again
Why we gotta fall for it now

I never meant to start a war
You know I never wanna hurt you
Don't even know what we're fighting for

Why does love always feel like a battlefield?

Today was Mandai Orchard Garden! Its been so long since i posted about 'today' as opposed to always blogging about what happen a few days ago or even posting pics up from a month plus ago hahaha.

Finally went after having to postpone it from friday, to monday, to the next monday, and finally to this monday.

Of course, pictures pictures :) Btw people, previous post has been edited

Helped the orchids to pollinate by what the guy told us was basically plucking out the orchid's testes and shove it down the female part-.-
And they made us practice plucking weeds which is nicer terms for sai gang lol.

having subway now :D Parents always dont know what its called so call it submarine-.- hahaha! they opened a new branch at pasir ris! happy happy hahaha (: someone dont know what he's missing lolll

back to square one
thinking maybe its my fault
thinking i should have just gave in
&maybe it'll go back to how it used to be
cause no way did all that made it better

i'm gonna try again, and give it my all (:

EDITED w pics (:

Yayyyyy blogger's back to normal!

Anw it was B day on the nineteen! 8D Sweet sixteen heh. Firstly thank you to everybody,

Family(: , Sean, Vanessa, Yujie, Ashley, Lina, Baxter, Eunice Lim, Sumei, Lee Jiahui, Xiaowei, Xintian, Eunice Tan, Nien An, Nicholas, Liying, Sherman, Joyce, Vincent, Rachel, Felicia, Isabella, Cheryl, Miaomiao, Shimei, Jamela, Moses Lim (lol-.-), Aaron, Shirlyn, Hanlin, Shuqi, Chikhim, Kellie, Terrence, Nick, Linghong, Jiazheng, Diana, Wanying, Sherlyn, w400 & E498!

Made me feel really loved that day :D
The thing about facebook is that many unexpected people wished me, but still thankyouu! (:

Pictures today wont be so pretty, cause i took them at night and they had the really HDB looking lighting, courtesy of my father-.- lol!

Shaker Fries from Xiaowei! 6th packet that i ate by myself already D: Must stop eating them!

And elephant from Jiahui :D it makes a good pillow for sleeping in class

And this package from Isabella Miao Shimei Cheryl Nienan Liying ((:

turned out to be a cute zipper and bow tube dress haha. Parkway after school but i didnt wear it as they told me to though lol cause of.. inner probems-.- if you get what i mean! hahaha. Free ice cream at swensens plus another 40bucks on food but still wasnt full lol

got a surprise when i got home. ballons! :D

more on the floor

&at the end of the ribbon was kinder bueno! :DD

They are really party animals-.- all my past birthday presents, Bearbear from last year:D Octopus from richard when i was sec2 lol and hippo my P4 present. You realise i always get stuffed toys haha!

even kristy was wearing haha! she was made to wear the whole day cause they dont know what time i'll be back

she sleeps like a freak-.- in the most awkward positions haha

lookalike right! hahaha

i've been chasing all my flyaway ballons around my house this few days haha! but still, was really touched ♥

more food! :D mummy made for me yay

i like this cake (:

i realise candlelight makes eyebags especially unflattering :( lol

woke up in the morining and mummy added more additions to the party animals haha!

Thursday was like a speed date lol! it was a holiday thanks to baojia haha. Cause it was rush to Plaza Sing, rush to buy food, rush to watch movie, &finally rush home haha. Watched Where Got Ghost? More funny than scary but there was one part where i really got scared lol.

And friday after dance rushed to yujie's place. they gave me another dress hahaha, pics not with me though so may edit later. many thanks to them (: its 3am now cause photos took so long to upload ): shall end this post so ttfn! :D

edit:

Looks like some graduation photo haha. The rest of the pics not posted cause i look superrr ugly-.- As i said, not my angle! hahaha When i was sec2 we did the the 2finger twist sign. So 16th birthday did the sec4 sign! :D

Pretty interesting what nuffnang can tell you hur. Haha but its kinda freaky to think that sickos will actually go google that probably hopefully trying to find some revealing pictures, and the fact that it links to my blog isn't exactly very comforting either-.- lol!

:D

long weekend was a busy busy week for me! but plenty of pictures alrighty (:

school celebrations on friday (: we sang happy birthday to the cake hahaha (:

bella helped most ppl paint their faces (: poor nien an had yihui and zixuan to 'help'her haha!

after school is our annual SEESA Nday gathering! :D first time all 5 of us could make it yay (: watched UP! at orchard! highly recommend to go catch it. i like the birdyy lol (:

went to check out ION after that. angela had to leave early for piano ): and then was the dilema of present shopping. so many ppl like us were camwhoring at ION toilet, cause its too nice! haha!

there was only 3 letters 'S' 'E' and 'B' but no 'A'

dinner with bestie at tampines after that and finally got all my presents (: i miss times like this with them.

not the most glam pic of mum

next day was steamboat and back to ION and orchard and starbucks with family

and finally, national day itself (: but that, i'll be selfish, only a little sneak peak for you haha :D

more starbucks :D watched hangover which i found rather disturbing. it was NC16 for coarse language and some nudity but it was more like R21 fucking vulgar and porn-.- one of my least favoritw show i've watched actually though some hv to say some parts is pretty funny lol

rushed home and supposed to head for pri school chalet but due to lotsa last min screwups, didnt manage to happen ): novia also invited me to ball but cldnt make it. really busy busy week ey? &i didnt regret (: